TESTIMONIALS
Retrouvaille works when both spouses are open to the programme. Many consider the programme to be like a self help marriage seminar. This page contains stories of a few of the many couples who have successfully ‘turned around’ troubled marriages. These testimonials are directly from couples who have gone through the Retrouvaille programme.
Separate, busy lives
Maria and Paul went out together for eight years and lived with each other for three of them so that by the time they got married in 1991 they felt they knew each other. "We did, but not quite as well as we thought," says Paul.
Infidelity
Looking back on 47 years of marriage, Helen could see that six children, bereavement, two jobs, separate interests and different agendas all posed challenges to their relationship. Her husband had two affairs.
What children say
Three teenagers describe how it felt to live in homes with unhappy parents, and how things turned around, long term, after their parents attended the Retrouvaille programme, renewing all their hopes.
Finding hope
Tracey, at 33 years old, would never have admitted that she was in a troubled marriage. She knew deep inside that she did not want to live the rest of her life going back and forth from arguing to the silent treatment.
Learning to listen
Liz and Geoff had to face the fact that after 20 years of living together, they were like two strangers who had nothing in common but their children. Tension levels increased until a persistent friend suggested Retrouvaille.
Distance & resentment
Joe & Mary Murphy had been married for 20 years but at least 10 of those had been what Joe describes as 'a silent hell'. They were full of resentment towards each other. 'Everything was empty & joyless. We had built a wall between us.'
We survived!
Gary and Debbie thought their marriage was made in heaven, and protected it by avoiding sharing negative feelings. After 10 years together, without either of them realising it, slowly but surely a great distance had grown between them.
A crucial decision
Couples describe how they came to the decision to attend a Retrouvaille programme. Some were unwilling and had to be persuaded by a spouse or a friend, others felt they had nothing to lose. Some were already separated.
I WAS NOT READY FOR A CHANGE
One of the main reasons I did not want to attend a weekend was I figured they would want me to change. I was not ready for a change.
A GOOD EXCUSE
"My husband tried for a year to get me to go to Retrouvaille. A weekend would come up and he would ask me again to attend. I would have an excuse ("a good excuse") each time.
FRUSTRATED AND HELPLESS
I had several times given up hope that our relationship could be repaired. I came to Retrouvaille for the same reason that I had not walked away and had gone to marriage counselling.
i just want out
"I did not want to go on the Retrouvaille weekend. My brother and his wife were involved with Marriage Encounter at the time and they are the ones who convinced me to go.
MY WIFE IS VERY IMPORTANT TO ME
"I am a control freak. I lived in this perfect little world where nothing was wrong because I wouldn't let it go wrong. My wife had asked me to attend Marriage Encounters in the past, but I just took the attitude of 'Why should we attend that, we're not in trouble?'. Boy was I ever wrong!
RETROUVAILLE SAVED MY MARRIAGE
'What's the worst thing that could happen?' The worst thing that could happen is that nothing happens and you're back where you started from, but maybe, just maybe, something positive will happen.